No Filter Winter

Today morning was so beautiful, that no words are needed. Neither are filters.

New Year Resolutions

It really baffles me how the further into life I go, the more of my most gorgeous and most admired girlfriends come out with low self-esteem issues.

It scares me as I am someone who is often regarded as really happy, really lucky and I think I am, as much as I can be. I try to squeeze everything I can out of life, I try to make it more exciting when things are getting grim. But I could never say that my life is super-happy, it is so far away from those happy girls on instagram who #lovelife.

I must mention, I’m not stupid – I know a lot of it is fake and hyped-up. But those words don’t really make me feel better. When it used to be just celebrities in magazines and on TV it was fine. But now it’s ‘real’ people. People like you and me, but the difference is they’re uber happy.

And I feel awful, because I come across as if I’m complaining. All I want to say is that firstly, I want to be honest about how I feel. Secondly, I believe this topic is still not discussed loud enough. And lastly, it helps to feel like I’m not alone, when I read other bloggers’ posts, so hopefully I can help someone feel better too.

I struggle with self-love quite a bit. It's so difficult sometimes, that I don't even admit to myself that I need to love myself more, because I don't deserve even my own love. Ouch!

But the truth is, who will ever be able to love us if we don't love ourselves? If you love yourself, you'll have rays of confidence streaming out of you and you will attract love from other people. And I understand that, which is why my main goal for 2015 is to love myself. I know that there are a lot of people who struggle with it, so I wanted to share the main things that I will be focusing on. 

Some of these I already do and they help me feel better about myself - good old sense of achievement. And the other I really struggle with and I battle through my days trying to get better at it.

Autumn in Notting Hill

A couple of weekends ago my friend and I went to Notting Hill to enjoy the autumn. I love areas of London like that, I have always had a dream of living in a tiny little London flat in a terraced house. I always imagined it to be super cosy with low lighting, cups of fragrant tea, knitted jumpers and reading with the sound of rain outside the window. Notting Hill reminds me of that area I saw in my dreams.

Accidental Trip to Belgium. Oops!

So a few weekends ago I accidentally ended up in Belgium.

My lovely Hugo, being the spontaneous type he is, called me up as soon as I finished work on Friday and started selling the idea of coming to Belgium with him. I was sceptical, as I didn’t feel like sitting on the shore for 2 days and waiting for him to finish sailing. But during the 30 minutes on my way back I thought – London, the food markets and clothes shops are going to be here every weekend. Belgium on the other hand, is a nice adventure. It was a yes!

Snacks. Healthy Beetroot Crisps

I am quite the snacker. I sometimes just have a whole load of snacks for dinner. I know – it’s not great, but I just love picking at things! 

I attempt making good snacking choices, like nuts and seeds, veggies or fruit. Recently I got into bread with virgin olive oil, which is not great. What I’m also not too proud of is my never-ending love of peanut butter… Sometimes I watch TV with a new jar of peanut butter and suddenly I realise that it’s already only half-full... Oops! I do only buy 100% peanut butter to avoid the additives and naughty oils. The brands I like in the UK are NutShot (my absolute favourite), Biona and Peanut Butter and Co. 

However, my main snacking problem is that when I’m in the mood for a snack, there are usually not many options around! And I usually need it ‘n o w’. Which leaves me with shop-bought treats, which are not always the best – I like to know what exactly goes into my food and how is it cooked. 

But recently I discovered a snack that is easy to make and I actually really enjoy making it. Beetroot crisps! 

Salty water and cheese in Whitstable

Last weekend Hugo and I went to Whitstable to participate in a sailing race. It was so beautiful - I was willing to keep my heavily-salt-treated eyes open as much as I could.

Home is Where The Heart is

I went home a week and a bit ago.  For those who don’t know, my home is Lithuania. And it is definitely where my heart is.

7 Reasons Sugar is a Bad Boy and 7 Ways to Beat it. Refined-Carb-Free Pizza

How many teaspoons of sugar do you think there are in one (just one) can of Coke?

Any guesses?

Hmm?

...

Frikin’ 10!!!!

80% of foods sold in the US contain added sugar. Knowing that sugar is 8 times more addictive than cocaine, does this not make you wonder why?.. My relationship with sugar has definitely gone a little too far.

Eat What You Want

I am sorry I have not been present for a while. There were a few eyebrows raised regarding why have I been quiet for so long - I have explained myself and told them that I don’t want to push it when there is no inspiration. It is sad - I began feeling differently towards the blog after I have started working. I think the tiredness has won in the battle with me in many instances, but I am back nonetheless!

That does not mean that I have not been cooking or thinking about food. Not at all! There have been many new things I have tried, many new ingredients I have discovered and, sadly, many failures in my kitchen, which my boyfriend Hugo has been very English about and politely smiled a lot.

I have wanted to write about this topic for a while, but the frost today in the morning has pushed me over the edge and I have performed a handshake with myself over sitting down and actually putting pen to paper (i.e. fingertips to keyboard).

The Best Banana Bread

I love trying out new things in the kitchen, I get a little too excited about how are they going to come out, how some of the flavours match together, how some of the colours and smells are just made to be bonded. I try to cook something new almost every day, there are just so many things that I want to try! It just seems to me that it would be like reading the same books or watching the same films over and over again if I were to cook the same meals repeatedly.

Chicken breasts with fennel and tangerines

Last weekend was a real foodie weekend. My boyfriend’s mum happily agreed for me to cook dinner on Saturday, which I took up very seriously, spending about 2 hours researching the Internet for recipes… and ending up creating something of my own at the end (inspired by something from my mum's blog)

Cardamom rice pudding with strawberries for your loved ones

Welcome autumn!

I know it’s not real autumn just yet and there is hopefully a long Indian summer to come, but I like to organise my life into clear seasons, 3 months each. And I have grown to like autumn recently, so I am quite looking forward to the cosy chilly evenings in a blanket, even more tea, lots of hugs and cuddles, and, most importantly, all the amazing veg coming into season.

Speaking of the cuddles, I am just about to throw something personal into the wild space of internet, but I try to be honest each time before a recipe, and this just seems to be the true reason behind it, so there I go. I warn you in case you want to skip straight to the recipe - this is quite cheesy.

The perfect treat: Baby Dutch Pancake

Guess who’s back?

Do you like my new look?

You know, I ask all these questions in almost every one of my posts and hardly anyone ever answers them. Come on, peeps, get involved! The Internet is a lovely bubble in which we are all a big happy family of anonymous members. You can be my politest friend in real life, but disguise yourself and tell me what utter rubbish this new design is and what a freak I am for sharing lists of food items and how to mix them in different ways on the internet. Or you can swear, but please don’t. Or you can just say hi. Or you can tell me how and why you like food. Or you can be someone who secretly loves me and you can confess your love here and I will never know who you are! (Or will I?... muahahahaha!*)

Student food: Healthy fried chicken and crispy chips

I am about to finish Uni.

Oh my goodness.

I definitely do not feel ready! I think the most difficult thing to say goodbye to is the times when you wake up for a lecture and think 'do I want to go?..' and you DO have the choice to say no! When is the next time in life you will be able to do that?? (Hi mum, just to let you know I always do say yes. It's just nice to have the choice!)

Spring breakfast: smoothies!

I really know what Jamie Cullum means when he sings

...If I ruled the world 

Every day would be the first day of spring...

It really is like a fresh start. Everything blooms and somehow I cannot pass any trees that are blooming quietly, I have to shout at everyone around me 'oh my goodness look at that!!' And those priceless surprised faces expecting something really exciting suddenly looking that direction for a few moments, until they turn grim after realising I am getting over-excited about.. a tree.

Local food adventures. Mussels

Don't you just love unexpected adventures? When something just spontaneously comes up and makes your day?

Hugo and I went for a quick walk on the beach, as it was, finally, a nice, sunny day. I was in 
Hugo's uncle's slippers, which was not very convenient when we decided to go near the rocks to see if there were any mussels around. We'd had lunch already and dinner was on its way, but we decided to have quite a fancy snack - mussels in garlicky white wine sauce. I have to admit, I'm happy such luxurious snacks do not appear on my plate every day, otherwise I wouldn't be able to enjoy them as much (and I'd be very fat)!

Cheap Low-fat Vegetarian Lasagna

 

1. An unexpected dinner party fell upon us recently. 
2. The budget was exceptionally tight due to recent events (me falling asleep in the airport in Istambul and missing my flight, how charming).
3. Fancy, quick and impressive dinner on a low budget?

Lasagna!!!!

Really Quick Garlic Salmon on a Vegetable Mash

Holidays... To most women (and men?) who cook at home holidays are a divine space of time where you can finally get away from the kitchen and have a rest while having your food served to you. I am, however, not in that category. I cannot say that I don't like to have food cooked for me, especially by my mum or my almost-a-professional-chef boyfriend Hugo, but when it comes to holidays, I am terribly sad to have to leave my kitchen. I miss cooking, I miss realising my inspirations, I miss the excitement I get when something turns out unexpectedly delicious.

I just got back from a holiday in Israel, where the only cooking I got to do was getting together a few salads. I have to say, I will really miss all the fresh food you get in a country where the fresh produce is top quality all throughout the year, but there is something very special about living in cold and snowy (!!!!!) England, where cooking food takes a while, warms up the kitchen and slowly makes all the eaters more and more excited as the scents spread. I think it is fascinating, how food here earns such a comforting role. 

Tomato and Feta Muffins

I am terribly sorry for my absence.

Uni got in my way and it just got terribly hectic! But I proudly announce that I have officially finished my dissertation and now I can finally tell you what's been going on in the kitchen.

If you think that all this workload has kept me away from the oven, you are wrong, ladies and gentlemen. I've tried a few new things, have been procrastinating by fishing for inspiration, bought a new desserts book...

I'll tell you a secret: if I could, I would eat sweet things every day. I am fussy about my desserts but I would be quite happy if my body had some magical power to turn sugar into vitamins or something. But the thing is, I'm not a fan of cooking sweet things. I like to be creative in the kitchen and often I feel that sweet recipes do not give you that creative space, as you need to follow a really strict recipe. Of course, when it works out right it's really rewarding. How do you feel about these things?

Love Soup

Don't you just love soups?

I do. That lovely broth, that lovely texture, that lovely warmth when you're cold and the refreshing feeling when you're hot. But most importantly - that pleasant feeling that you've just eaten something good for you and it was so yummy!

My friend Meg and I had a little afternoon together the other day and I was telling her about my recent Pinterest obsession and the inspiration I get there. So we decided to make a love soup - one that your eyes love and one that loves you - your taste buds and your health.